The information shared by all these experts was phenomenal! The knowledge and proficiency of the presenters and members of the Expert Panel was impressive and perfect for what the attendees were seeking. I was pleased to

offer the benefit of my vast experience in business along with the principles of success that I know affect all areas of our lives including making money and business. People came away from that experience with a clear understanding of what they needed to do to take their business venture to the next level or clear into the stratosphere!

The concept of finding someone (a Joint Venture partner) who knows how to do what you don’t know how to do, is very smart. That was one of the possible benefits for attendees. They came with the hope that they would meet people who they could JV with to help get their businesses further down the road.

I know that people were able to form JVs with some of the experts that presented there and some even created JV with other attendees. That was what that event was all about.

It was fun to meet so many entrepreneurs who were there seeking ways to be more successful in their business. The attitude of someone who is, or wants to be, their own boss and run their own show, is very different than someone who is happy at a job. Entrepreneurs are driven from within to make things happen, be creative, take risks and think out of the proverbial box. I love helping anyone in any area of life I have expertise in which is why my book, The DNA of Success, is so successful, but talking business with business minded people adds a flavor that is delicious.

Perhaps YOU should consider doing one or more Joint Ventures too. A qualified JV partner can cause your business to take a dramatic leap forward because that person brings to the table wisdom, knowledge, strengths and experience that you don’t have.

Check out my free video series Making Money Truths to find the best business venture for you!

	How you can get the cash flow you need - quickly and easily
	7 of the most popular ways to make money so you can find one that fits your personality, comfort level, and pocket book
	How making money can actually be FUN for you!
	The blunt, no holds barred pros and cons on what works and what you should look out for!

Get my best selling book The DNA of Success too. It combined with the video series will give you the information it takes to achieve success in life and business.

]]> http://jackzufelt.com/joint-ventures-equal-business-growth/feed/ 25 http://jackzufelt.com/attitude-of-gratitude-equals-happiness/ http://jackzufelt.com/attitude-of-gratitude-equals-happiness/#comments Tue, 09 Nov 2010 05:36:37 +0000 Jack M. Zufelt http://jackzufelt.com/?p=2432 November is a month for where at least one day of the whole year is dedicated to Thanksgiving. Giving thanks is something you do or say to show what you are grateful for. We say, thank you for doing that for me; or I am thankful I have a job; we prepare a big dinner and give thanks for this great country we live in. etc.

Having gratitude and feeling grateful is different. The definition of gratitude in Webster’s Dictionary is: a feeling of thankful appreciation for favors or benefits received.

Being able to feel gratitude is a major source of joy in life. It is one of the most important things that causes a person to be happy, positive and optimistic and have the right perspective in spite of what other negative things or problems that may also be going on in their life.

If gratitude is so important to maximizing joy and happiness in life don’t you think you should know what all you are grateful for? Wouldn’t it be wise and uplifting to constantly be able to see all the things that are good in you life? This is especially important when we are down, beat up discouraged, or having serious challenges.

Here is a fun exercise that is quite rewarding and many times an eye opener for people.

Having an Attitude of Gratitude

Make a list of EVERYTHING you can think of that you are grateful for. I am sure the length of that list will surprise you.

During one of the toughest times in my life when things were going badly I decided to see what I had to be grateful for in spite of the problems and difficulty I was experiencing at that time. I was surprised at how many good things I had going for me.

I want to share that list, or at least part of it, with you so you can get an idea of the gazillion things you have to be grateful for as well.

Here is why I have an attitude of gratitude. I am grateful that:

• I am still alive;
• that I have food to eat every day and clean water to drink;
• that I can shower whenever I want;
• that I am basically healthy;
• that my wife is still in love with me I and I her;
• that I have a car;
• that I have always had a place to sleep;
• a home, a nice bed and furniture;
• that I have lots of fun possessions that make me happy;
• that I have the internet;
• that I have glasses so I can see clearly;
• that I have a life insurance policy so in case I die my wife and family are taken care of;
• that all my children are happy and well adjusted adults;
• that we all have great relationships with each other;
• that I have dear friends; that I can laugh and play;
• that I found God and that He loves me;
• that have a relationship with Him;
• that I have been protected from major accidents;
• that my business is successful;
• that I love what I do for an income;
• that I am free;
• that I have been blessed and taught by others in ways that changed my life forever;
• that God answers my prayers;
• that I am able to bless others with the knowledge and wisdom I have been blessed with;
• that I have two books published and one is a best seller;
• that I have difficulties for they made me strong;
• that I have problems for the force me to find solutions which develops wisdom;
• that I know how to work;
• that I have had to face dangers for they taught me about courage;

Make your own list. Put down the smallest details.

You’ll be pleasantly surprised what all you have to grateful for!

You’ve heard of him by now – hero Jasper Schuringa threw himself on the terrorist who was trying to blow up Northwest Airlines Flight 253, grabbed the bomb out of his hands and held him while other people put the fire out with blankets and fire extinguishers.

Self Transformation: Where Is My ON Switch?!

First, let me say, my gratitude and admiration know no bounds.  I can only hope that I would have that kind of courage in a similar situation.  Actually, my greater hope is I’ll never have to face a similar situation, but if I did, I’d want to react like Jasper Schuringa.

You might be wondering why I’m writing about Jasper Schuringa in a blog post about self transformation.  His heroism is obviously a great example to us, but, besides that, he serves as a terrific model of the difference between living by Core Desires versus living by goal-setting, affirmations, and (the dreaded) New Year’s Resolutions.

If you read my last blog, you know that in crisis moments, heroes probably aren’t sitting down and listing goals, baby steps, affirmations and rewards.  Heroes see what they want and they go get it! Jasper Schuringa knew what he wanted – an intact airplane.  So he leaped over seats and went after it.

This is the kind of intensity that I want for you in your life!  Hopefully you’ll never come face to face with a terrorist.  But you are face to face with time, mediocrity, and unrealized hopes.   It’s time to unleash the Conquering Force in you to find the self transformation that will change your life forever.  How?

First, answer these two questions:

• Are you smart enough to learn what someone is willing to teach you?
• Do you believe that the information  that you need to know to achieve the success you want already exists somewhere in a book, class, CD, coach or minister or course of some kind?

Let me make this easy for you:  the answer to both questions is

YES!

Mark Twain once said, “I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life.  The problem is that I can’t find anybody who can tell me what they want.”

Can you have what you want out of life?

Let’s say it again:

YES!

Do you know how to get it?

My friend, it’s time to learn.

If you’re ready to make real, lasting changes in your life, learn how now by accepting my gift to you this New Years, a huge discount on my self-transformation products that are proven, truthful and effective.

Have a brilliantly successful 2010!

Christmas Eve 1881

Pa never had much compassion for the lazy or those who squandered their means and then never had enough for the necessities. But for those who were genuinely in need, his heart was as big as all outdoors. It was from him that I learned the greatest joy in life comes from giving, not from receiving. It was Christmas Eve 1881. I was fifteen years old and feeling like the world had caved in on me because there just hadn’t been enough money to buy me the rifle that I’d wanted for Christmas. We did the chores early that night for some reason. I just figured Pa wanted a little extra time so we could read in the Bible.

After supper was over I took my boots off and stretched out in front of the fireplace and waited for Pa to get down the old Bible. I was still feeling sorry for myself and, to be honest, I wasn’t in much of a mood to read Scriptures. But Pa didn’t get the Bible, instead he bundled up again and went outside. I couldn’t figure it out because we had already done all the chores. I didn’t worry about it long though, I was too busy wallowing in self-pity.

Soon Pa came back in. It was a cold clear night out and there was ice in his beard. “Come on, Matt,” he said. “Bundle up good, it’s cold out tonight.” I was really upset then. Not only wasn’t I getting the rifle for Christmas, now Pa was dragging me out in the cold, and for no earthly reason that I could see. We’d already done all the chores, and I couldn’t think of anything else that needed doing, especially not on a night like this. But I knew Pa was not very patient at one dragging one’s feet when he’d told them to do something, so I got up and put my boots back on and got my cap, coat, and mittens. Ma gave me a mysterious smile as I opened the door to leave the house. Something was up, but I didn’t know what.

Outside, I became even more dismayed. There in front of the house was the work team, already hitched to the big sled. Whatever it was we were going to do wasn’t going to be a short, quick, little job. I could tell. We never hitched up this sled unless we were going to haul a big load. Pa was already up on the seat, reins in hand. I reluctantly climbed up beside him. The cold was already biting at me. I wasn’t happy. When I was on, Pa pulled the sled around the house and stopped in front of the woodshed. He got off and I followed. “I think we’ll put on the high sideboards,” he said. “Here, help me.” The high sideboards! It had been a bigger job than I wanted to do with just the low sideboards on, but whatever it was we were going to do would be a lot bigger with the high side boards on.

After we had exchanged the sideboards, Pa went into the woodshed and came out with an armload of wood – the wood I’d spent all summer hauling down from the mountain, and then all Fall sawing into blocks and splitting. What was he doing? Finally I said something. “Pa,” I asked, “what are you doing?” You been by the Widow Jensen’s lately?” he asked.

The Widow Jensen lived about two miles down the road. Her husband had died a year or so before and left her with three children, the oldest being eight. Sure, I’d been by, but so what?

Yeah,” I said, “Why?” “I rode by just today,” Pa said. “Little Jakey was out digging around in the woodpile trying to find a few chips. They’re out of wood, Matt.” That was all he said and then he turned and went back into the woodshed for an other armload of wood. I followed him. We loaded the sled so high that I began to wonder if the horses would be able to pull it. Finally, Pa called a halt to our loading, then we went to the smoke house and Pa took down a big ham and a side of bacon. He handed them to me and told me to put them in the sled and wait. When he returned he was carrying a sack of flour over his right shoulder and a smaller sack of something in his left hand. “What’s in the little sack?” I asked. Shoes, they’re out of shoes. Little Jakey just had gunny sacks wrapped around his feet when he was out in the woodpile this morning. I got the children a little candy too. It just wouldn’t be Christmas without a little candy.”

We rode the two miles to Widow Jensen’s pretty much in silence. I tried to think through what Pa was doing. We didn’t have much by worldly standards. Of course, we did have a big woodpile, though most of what was left now was still in the form of logs that I would have to saw into blocks and split before we could use it. We also had meat and flour, so we could spare that, but I knew we didn’t have any money, so why was Pa buying them shoes and candy? Really, why was he doing any of this? Widow Jensen had closer neighbors than us; it shouldn’t have been our concern.

We came in from the blind side of the Jensen house and unloaded the wood as quietly as possible, then we took the meat and flour and shoes to the door. We knocked. The door opened a crack and a timid voice said, “Who is it?” “Lucas Miles, Ma’am, and my son, Matt, could we come in for a bit?” Widow Jensen opened the door and let us in. She had a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. The children were wrapped in another and were sitting in front of the fireplace by a very small fire that hardly gave off any heat at all. Widow Jensen fumbled with a match and finally lit the lamp.

“We brought you a few things, Ma’am,” Pa said and set down the sack of flour. I put the meat on the table. Then Pa handed her the sack that had the shoes in it. She opened it hesitantly and took the shoes out one pair at a time. There was a pair for her and one for each of the children – sturdy shoes, the best, shoes that would last. I watched her carefully. She bit her lower lip to keep it from trembling and then tears filled her eyes and started running down her cheeks. She looked up at Pa like she wanted to say something, but it wouldn’t come out.

“We brought a load of wood too, Ma’am,” Pa said.

He turned to me and said, “Matt, go bring in enough to last awhile. Let’s get that fire up to size and heat this place up.” I wasn’t the same person when I went back out to bring in the wood. I had a big lump in my throat and as much as I hate to admit it, there were tears in my eyes too. In my mind I kept seeing those three kids huddled around the fireplace and their mother standing there with tears running down her cheeks with so much gratitude in her heart that she couldn’t speak. My heart swelled within me and a joy that I’d never known before, filled my soul. I had given at Christmas many times before, but never when it had made so much difference. I could see we were literally saving the lives of these people. I soon had the fire blazing and everyone’s spirits soared.

The kids started giggling when Pa handed them each a piece of candy and Widow Jensen looked on with a smile that probably hadn’t crossed her face for a long time. She finally turned to us. “God bless you,” she said. “I know the Lord has sent you. The children and I have been praying that he would send one of his angels to spare us.” In spite of myself, the lump returned to my throat and the tears welled up in my eyes again. I’d never thought of Pa in those exact terms before, but after Widow Jensen mentioned it I could see that it was probably true.

I was sure that a better man than Pa had never walked the earth. I started remembering all the times he had gone out of his way for Ma and me, and many others. The list seemed endless as I thought on it. Pa insisted that everyone try on the shoes before we left. I was amazed when they all fit and I wondered how he had known what sizes to get. Then I guessed that if he was on an errand for the Lord that the Lord would make sure he got the right sizes.

Tears were running down Widow Jensen’s face again when we stood up to leave. Pa took each of the kids in his big arms and gave them a hug. They clung to him and didn’t want us to go. I could see that they missed their Pa, and I was glad that I still had mine. At the door Pa turned to Widow Jensen and said, “The Mrs. wanted me to invite you and the children over for Christmas dinner tomorrow. The turkey will be more than the three of us can eat, and a man can get cantankerous if he has to eat turkey for too many meals. We’ll be by to get you about eleven. It’ll be nice to have some little ones around again. Matt, here, hasn’t been little for quite a spell.” I was the youngest. My two brothers and two sisters had all married and had moved away. Widow Jensen nodded and said, “Thank you, Brother Miles. I don’t have to say , May the Lord bless you, I know for certain that He will.”

Out on the sled I felt a warmth that came from deep within and I didn’t even notice the cold. When we had gone a ways, Pa turned to me and said, “Matt, I want you to know something. Your ma and me have been tucking a little money away here and there all year so we could buy that rifle for you, but we didn’t have quite enough. Then yesterday a man who owed me a little money from years back came by to make things square. Your ma and me were real excited, thinking that now we could get you that rifle, and I started into town this morning to do just that, but on the way I saw little Jakey out scratching in the woodpile with his feet wrapped in those gunny sacks and I knew what I had to do. Son, I spent the money for shoes and a little candy for those children. I hope you understand.”

I understood, and my eyes became wet with tears again. I understood very well, and I was so glad Pa had done it. Now the rifle seemed very low on my list of priorities. Pa had given me a lot more. He had given me the look on Widow Jensen’s face and the radiant smiles of her three children. For the rest of my life, Whenever I saw any of the Jensens, or split a block of wood, I remembered, and remembering brought back that same joy I felt riding home beside Pa that night. Pa had given me much more than a rifle that night, he had given me the best Christmas of my life. Don’t be too busy today. Share this inspiring message. God bless you!

Let’s all be an “angel” to someone this Christmas season and through out the coming year. If you have children include them so they can experience the joy of helping others.

MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Jack M. Zufelt

“Mentor to Millions”

P.S.-Don’t forget to get your Christmas gift from me!

A Christmas Story & Gift From Jack!

REMEMBER to scroll to the bottom after you’ve read the story
to receive your Christmas gift from me!

Part 2:  Stories abound that touch the soul and remind us of
what is really important.

Here is one by Claire Robinson:

Eric scuffled out of the run down apartment building. Again
he was alone. The streets looked like a long wet pieces of
black licorice under the street lights.  As Eric walked he
began his escape into another world. He left his feelings of
loneliness and unhappiness and entered a world in which he
hungered to belong.

Why was Eric escaping? Eric was an orphan. His mother died
when he was two and his father was never around. His father
did provide food but he drank away the rest of his earnings.
His brothers and sisters had orphaned him too. They had run
away from the world which seemed to keep Eric a prisoner.
Education had orphaned him too. He just did not have the
clothes or the social acceptance to be a part of school. So
each day would grind painfully past with nothing to do or
live for.

This is why Eric was escaping; escaping into a world of
imagination, fun and fantasy. A world which treated him like
an equal. This wonderful place was the “Christmas World”.
He did not understand why people were so kind at this time
of year, but they were. He loved to walk the streets and see
the lights and Christmas scenes. He loved to hear the gaiety
and laughter of the holiday season. As Eric approached one
department store, he gazed in the window.

There was Santa in red and white sitting in his magnificent
throne giving candy to little children who would sit on his
lap. A tear welled up in his eye. He could never remember
Santa coming to his home.  At age 12 he knew Santa was not
true but still he wished he could find a present under the
non-existent tree in the front room.

Eric became depressed in his beautiful world. No longer was
he equal. He was cold, helpless, hungry and feeling
abandoned. This feeling overwhelmed him and hurt so much
that he darted down an ally to get away from it.

As he was halfway down the ally he heard a soft, timid
whimpering sound. He stopped—looked around—and started to
walk on. He heard the noise again and began to move toward
it. There huddled in a dark corner was a cold wet stranded
puppy. It tired to growl to frighten off this giant
stranger, but it was too weak and hungry for any sound to
come out.

Eric picked up the puppy and began petting it. He became
aware of how frail his new found friend was. He felt a
quiver go through the puppy and realized it was time for a
decision. In his pocket was one of his most treasured
possessions, his lucky dime. He had found it in his mother’s
old purse. Though he never knew his mother he loved the dime
and knew it was lucky because it was once hers. Eric looked
at his dime and he looked at the quivering friend. He held
the puppy tight as he once again emerged into the Christmas
world. Quickly he paced off the two blocks to an old grocery
store. There in that store he left the only remembrance of
his mother and bought a carton of milk.

Carrying the puppy and clutching the milk he descended down
the dark ally. Sitting on the ground, he poured the ivory
liquid into his hand. AS tears trickled down his cheeks,
feelings of loneliness and abandonment vanished. A Strong
union of friendship was created as Eric whispered in the
puppy’s ear, “Puppy, I’ll be your Santa.”

There are many children who will not have much of a
Christmas, if any, this year. Let’s all decide to give to a
child this Christmas season so they can feel loved and be
uplifted no matter what their circumstances are. And
remember, it is not the cost of the present that matters it
is the love that is felt when we give from the heart.

I wrote the following poem after having discovered the
blessings that come to me for giving to others.

To have your spiritual needs met,
It is better to give than to get.
Reach out to those in need
And your soul you will feed.

I hope you all have a wonderful, fun and love filled
Christmas season!

Jack M. Zufelt
“Mentor to Millions”

P.S. And now for my opportunity to give to you!

For the first time ever I’m giving 12 gifts away this year!

Join me in my celebration of the Holidays and except a gift
from me for the next 12 days by going here:

http://www.12daysxmas.com
DNA of Success

Making Changes in Tough Times: Are You REALLY Ready to Take a Chance?

Axler’s traditional market, traditional Kosher Jewish consumers, was shrinking, and in spite of the trend toward more healthful living, no one was rushing in to fill the gap in sales.

So would you like to hear the bad news first, or the good?

I’ll start with the bad:  When he decided to develop Brekfish, Axler didn’t give his research due diligence.  Due diligence can be loosely defined as “giving a task the amount of work and attention that it deserves.”  When it comes to researching major decisions that could make or break your small business, that task deserves quite a bit of work and attention indeed.

Is Brekfish as bad product?  Quite the contrary:  All reports are that it’s delicious – crisp and flavorful.  It could very well become the healthy choice for bacon lovers.  The mistake Axler made was that, before making changes, failing to find out whether his hopes of getting Brekfish on the supermarket shelves were realistic.  Retailers were unwilling to put the product on the shelves until Axler created consumer interested with a big-budget campaign.  He simply didn’t have the resources.

Now for the good news:  While Axler failed to forage for the best information, the best information was thrust upon him.  Fortune Small Business sent three experts to offer him the best advice.  What gems of wisdom did they have to offer?

• Rather than targeting national-chain supermarkets, focus on his best local markets, like delis and specialty supermarkets.
• Narrow his brand. Because the company had been in business for so long, the various products had packaging that reflected the time of their development, and even different brand names. Business consultant Victoria Nessen Kohlasch, chief executive of Nessen Kohlasch & Associates, insisted that he had to select develop unified packaging to develop brand recognition.
• Update his website to give it more value (recipes) and make it easier to buy.
• Focus on the health benefits of his products in both advertising and packaging.

If you are currently the vice president of a small fish business, you will find these specific tips helpful.  If you aren’t (and I’m guessing you aren’t), you still have a great deal to learn from Alan Axler.  Chances are, a panel of experts won’t show up at your door to hand you the information you need.  You have to go get it!

Go to the library, take classes, find mentors, talk to people, search the internet – do whatever you have to so you can start making changes toward your brighter, happier, more successful future.  This is your future!  Give it all the due diligence it deserves.

Are you ready to invest in your future?  Check out my Making Money is Fun video series.  Learn all about the different types of investments that are out there (and find out my favorite choices) so you can begin now making changes that will lead you to major success!

“I’ve had some bad experiences with trust at work,”  Jim wrote.  “At my last job, my boss didn’t trust anyone, and it showed.  He was completely disorganized, but he blamed me when he lost his paperwork.  He tried to micromanage everything, and he was always spying on me and the other employees.  I’d turn around from my computer and he’d be reading over my shoulder.  He actually went through people’s desks a couple of time.  He was always talking about honesty – how it was dishonest to get paid for a full day’s work without giving it – but he made all kinds of promises he never kept.”

As an employer, should you trust your employees?  As an employee, should you trust your employer?  Can you trust your mentor?  Your doctor?  Your spouse?

“Trust” is one of the Seven Words that Can Change Your Life.  To get anything done, you have to take a chance on people . . . including yourself.

Trust –   Trust your mentors, your instructors, your spouse, doctor, boss.  Trust yourself:

Do you trust . . .

• Your ability to learn?
• That if you take action, you actually can change things?
• That most people care?
• That your research is reliable?

Earn the trust of the people in your life, and never break that trust.   Give your trust to others, and, yes, I mean give it before it’s earned.  When you hold back your trust, you usually create self-fulfilling prophesies.    For example, employers who spy on their employees create such an atmosphere of distrust and hostility that the employees feel no sense of loyalty or shared goals.  On the other hand, the U.S. Department of Labor reports that although the workplace is inundated with information technology, workers aren’t so busy updating their Facebook status that they fail to work.  On the contrary, in spite of what Human Resources departments everywhere would predict, productivity keeps rising.

It’s time to discover your Core Desires and use them to propel you into the life you’ve always dreamed of.   Learn how now with the Conquering Force Audio/Book Package (save over $400!).

The celebrity had two choices.  He could either (A) pay the blackmailer or (B) allow the blackmailer to come forward with the evidence, destroying his family, his reputation and his career.  He felt frightened and vulnerable.

Seven Words to Change Your Life: Can The Truth Set You Free?

Remember the discussion of choices in my last blog?    Given two choices, A and B, the celebrity chose C.   He pre-empted the blackmailer by admitting his mistakes in the most public forum possible and took the whole situation to the police.  The blackmailer, as I write this, is sitting in jail.

Granted, the celebrity still has the consequences of his mistakes, but he’s not longer imprisoned by the fear of being exposed.  He can meet reality in the face and deal with it directly.  The truth, very simply, set him free.

“Truth” is one of the seven words that can change your life.  Knowing our shortcomings and failings means having to feel uncomfortable and having to decide whether to address them.  To avoid this discomfort, we tend to view ourselves through rose-colored glasses.   But to institute real change in your life, you need to be willing to live in reality.

• Don’t rationalize. If the situation is bad, say it’s bad. If you made a mistake, admit it. If you’re unhappy, face it, so you can change your life.
• Don’t make excuses. In the corporate world, you live by these initials: CYA. But to change your life, you don’t cover yourself to dodge problems – you fix the problems.
• Have at least one friend or mentor who will hold you accountable for honesty and honest effort.

You live in a certain construct of beliefs.  When you’re confronted with facts that disprove those beliefs, you experience something the psychologists call Cognitive Dissonance (knowing two opposing facts for sure).  The human response to Cognitive Dissonance is to make the mind comfortable as quickly as possible, usually by discounting the new facts.   Living in reality – knowing the truth – means staying uncomfortable long enough to find the real facts, and then adjusting your construct to reflect those facts.

Put the Seven Words that Can Change Your Life to work.  Learn how with the Conquering Force Audio/Book Package (save over $400!).

Maybe you’ve seen the video.  A heavy storm in the Netherlands stranded over one hundred horses on a small island of raised land, where they suffered from food and exposure for three days as concerned people frantically tried to find a way to rescue them.  Even as the waters slowly receded, the traumatized animals didn’t risk putting a hoof in the waters that had so terrified them.

Seven Words to Change Your Life: How Can You Get Past Your Resistance To Change?

Finally, in a moment of inspiration, four women rode on horseback all the way to the island, then turned back toward safe ground.  The stranded horses danced with excitement, then stepped carefully into the water to follow into a narrow that eventually stretched all the way from the island to the dry land where the anxious crowd of humans awaited them.

Why do I tell you this story?

First, because we are more like those frightened horses than we should be.  Once they found a bit of dry land, no matter how small, uncomfortable and incapable of supporting life long term, they resolved to stay there.  Changing their circumstances would have involved stepping back into the water to test its depth.

Second, because it illustrates the importance of having a mentor you can trust.  As soon as those four horses (with women on their backs, but that wasn’t important to the stranded horses right then) braved that muddy water, the others were willing to follow.  Follow so closely, in fact, that although the water had clearly receded to a manageable level all around the island, the horses didn’t risk stepping anywhere but where their mentor horses walked.  As relieved as they must have been to head for safety, they didn’t follow in a crowd, but in a dainty, single-file line.

If you’re stuck on a little piece of island that doesn’t really support your life, how can you overcome your own resistance and change your life?

• Set a timer and spend fifteen minutes listing ways to change your life, as quickly as you can. This is brainstorming, so no idea is too wild, big or unreasonable. Sometimes just setting aside our rational objections for a few minutes will bring new ideas to light.
• Think in terms of baby steps. If you want to change your saving habits, for example, so that you’re saving 10% of your income every month, start with 1% and increase it by a percentage point each month.
• Incorporate changed behaviors in to habits you already have. Let’s say you want to improve your marriage by showing your wife more appreciation. You don’t have that habit, but you are in the habit of brushing your teeth in the morning, right? So you add one more task to your tooth-brushing ritual – you use a washable marker and jot a note to your wife on the bathroom mirror: “Thanks for picking up my shirts!” “You looked beautiful this morning!”
• Stop and think. As I said in my last blog, habits are your autopilot. To change your autopilot’s settings, you’re going to have make adjustments through the day. This is harder than it sounds, because you’re usually thinking about other things. But let’s say you want to change your habit of being negative. Set your cell phone alarm to ring three times through the day. That’s your cue to stop and think about what you were just saying or doing. Were you drifting back into the negative? If so, make an adjustment to get yourself back on track.
• Have a mentor who will give you honest feedback about how you’re doing in moving toward your goals.

Change is never easy.  No matter how much you might say you want to change your life, you’re going to be drawn toward the unhappy familiar rather than the glorious unknown, but if you make a conscious decision to constructively deal with your resistance, you can overcome it.

I can help you.  Learn how to use the Conquering Force within you to change your life.  Save over $400 by taking advantage of the Conquering Force Audio/Book Package.

Five hours after Ryan picked his truck up from the mechanic, it stalled in rush hour traffic on the expressway.  He called a tow truck and then his wife.  “I’ve had it!” he fumed.  “This is the third time I’ve been stranded right after I’ve paid a bundle to get the truck fixed.  I’m going to give Jules a piece of mind this time!”

Seven Words to Change Your Life: What if You Want Your Life To Change . . . But You Don’t Want to Change?

“Why don’t you go to my brother’s mechanic?”  his wife answered reasonably.  “He’s had nothing to say but good things about him.”

Ryan huffed.  “I’m not going through all that.”

“All . . .  that?  What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’ve always gone to Jules, and I’m not going through the hassle of changing.  He’s just going to do the job right this time.  Are you coming to pick me up, or what?”

Change – it happens all the time.  But we don’t like it.  It’s uncomfortable and scary and a lot of work.  But if you’re stuck in an unhappy place – unhappy in your home, marriage, job, or even yourself – you need to change.  Yourself.  Not them.  Not it.  But you.

Expect to feel some resistance when you start.  You might catch yourself procrastinating, justifying your failure to change, or pointing your finger outward – “If she’d just change how she acts, I’d change how I talk to her!”  There are a lot of reasons to resist change:

• No matter how unhappy you may be with your present circumstances, they are familiar and comfortable. Change means leaving your comfort zone.
• You will probably experience fear of some kind – of failure, of not meeting other’s expectations, even of success.
• Habit is your autopilot, and anytime you aren’t actively piloting your behavior, you’ll default back to habit. To change your life you have to force yourself to stay conscious of your actions until the new habits are well and truly ingrained. And even then, you’ll have to stay vigilant to avoid backsliding.
• You may secretly (or not-so-secretly) have the underlying beliefs that you can’t really change your life for the better. In that case, why go through the discomfort of trying? You have to challenge that belief, as often and as forcefully as necessary.

Even if you don’t invite change into your life, it is going to come.  The only thing that doesn’t change is the truth . . . and one of those truths is that everything else changes.  Take control of  the direction of the changes in your life by confronting your resistance and resolving it once and for all.

No matter what your background is or how much you question your abilities, you can change your life.  Find out how with the Conquering Force Audio/Book Package (save over $400!).